My darling readers,
I have been kicking around this idea for quite some time now, and I think I’ve got most of the bugs and kinks banged out at this point. The following is a sample of copy that is due to go up on my website when I get back from Hawaii. What I need from you, dear readers, is feedback! Feedback life you’ve never feedback’d before! I need you to poke holes in my ideas, to offer up your own wants and desires when you think of a “man’s spa”, or tell me exactly /how/ you prefer to be shorn! Note that I do NOT know how to cut hair, and that would be a disastrous thing to add to my list of pamper. I will be hammering out details right up until launch day, and probably even after that, so nothing is set in stone!
What I also need, dear lovers and dreamers, are test subjects! Who wants to be this hot bunny’s test body? For the entire month of April I will be offering, at a 50% discount, all of these services to those willing to be a test subject for my new spa packages. The catch is this: You must give me your honest feedback on my skill, your comfort, what I should do differently and what you loved AND you must write me a little review to announce my services to our community. Game?
Oh! I nearly forgot: to the ladies on my blog (how I love you!) please don’t think that just because I’m calling this a “man’s spa” you can’t indulge! Contact me directly if you are too shy to post here, but these services are for -all- my clients, regardless of gender.
With no further ado!
A day at the spa. Does it conjure up images of coquettish ladies lounging in fluffy robes, gossiping about the latest drama whilst getting their toes buffed and polished? Or are you imagining a heavy set Russian woman with arms as strong as tree trunks manipulating and beating every inch of knotted muscles out of your back, followed by a steam in a sauna? A tub of expensive mud and cucumber slices over one’s eyes while listening to classical chamber music, perhaps?
Spa days aren’t just for women, and they shouldn’t be such a mystery as to not tempt you to try. The well-groomed man understands the need for clean, short, even nails, the exquisite pleasure of a foot rub, the relaxing experience of a well oiled massage. I am here to bring back the art of masculine grooming and pampering, to prove that a true gentleman doesn’t cringe from ointments, unguents, creams, lathers, and oils. How better to invigorate and restore a man’s pluck with an expert hand, foot, and shoulder massage and manicure?
But, to prove that this is truly an experience tailored to men, I am offering traditional hot lather shaves. With my trusty, vintage safety razor (and soon to come, straight razor), quality badger hair brush, and moisturizing and softening whipped lather I can tame your wily beard, trim a wandering mustache, or simply and cleanly bring you back to that smooth cheek women love to nuzzle and kiss! There is something so intimately sexy about shaving a man, especially when one is using techniques that have been around for quite some time. It truly is an art, and I am so excited to finally offer such an intimate experience. I use nothing but the best products and ingredients, including a specialized (and optional) bay laurel rum after shave oil that gives that brisk, wake up feeling with a soft, lingering scent reminiscent of those Caribbean pirates that first introduced this concoction to the lusty women in port!
Here’s what I’m aiming to offer:
- Pedicures and manicures- l including a foot/hand soak, aromatherapy oils, foot/hand and neck massage, quality, sterilized tools and an option of fine buff to shine or a clear coat of polish.
- Facial Masks (red moroccan or white clay, distilled water, a clarifying essential oil followed by a moisturizing oil and massage)
- Body Scrubs (mixture of organic sugar or salt, honey, and oil)
- Hot Oil Treatments (hot towel therapy followed by cleansing oils massaged in, then a second towel to remove oils and massage)
Massage will include high-end, organic oils, aromatherapy, with attention to head, neck, hands and feet
For the hot lather shaves, I plan on the following:
- Personal lather brush (labeled and kept on site/take home whichever is preferred)
- New, disposable double edged razor
- Hot towel treatment for face
- Natural and unscented lather
- Moisturizing oil treatment
- Optional bay rum after shave
If one were to sign up for the whole shebang, I imagine it would look a little like this:
A pleasant greeting by little ol’ me in an adorable smock and hair up in a bun. After a quick rinse off in my shower you would don my fluffiest robe and have a lounge in my comfy chair. While your hands and feet soak in warm, sudsy water I would begin your massage, starting with your scalp and moving down your head, neck and shoulders.
At this point, your hands should be ready for a thorough (but painless!) manicure and buff, with optional clear top coat. The massage continues with shoulders, arms and hands.
Next is the very important pedicure, done with as little tickling as possible. (there’s scrubbing, buffing, clipping, and possibly top coat painting here) I’ll bet you can guess that we conclude our manicure time with a foot and calf massage, and move on to our next adventure.
At this point, we can either wrap your face in a hot towel, apply luxurious lather and shave you to smoothness OR we can go the opposite direction and head towards the shower for a full body scrub. This is an excellent way to exfoliate AND moisturize, and for the man with the perma-dry skin this is the perfect way to get you back on track.
If a facial (or whole body!) mask is preferred, you would simply lay back snug in your robe and I would apply a cooling, clarifying clay mask with a natural bristle brush, and as that set for the 10-15 minutes needed to work it’s magic, now would be the time for that mani/pedi.
Masks are removed in two stages, a dry (gentle!) rub with a textured towel, and then a hot, moist towel laid atop for a few minutes then gently removed. This is followed up by a clarifying toner and a few drops of moisturizing oil. I have a few types that are specific for skin type, malady, or desired effect.
I am NOT a licensed herbalist, naturopath or esthetician, but I am confident that you will leave glowing!
What do you gentlemen think? Is this a little too ambitious, or is this something that we are all secretly clamoring for?
Spa Rates (still crunching numbers, here’s a rough estimate)
(initial fee includes personalized tools, brushes, oils and masks)
Add any of these to your FBST or GFE session, allow an extra 30-90 minutes. Alternatively, opt for the Full Spa Package as a stand alone session.
Shave – First visit 60 subsequent visits 40
Manicure and pedicure – First visit 60 subsequent visits 50
Manicure/pedicure, shave – First visit 80 subsequent visits 60
Manicure, pedicure, shave – First visit 100 subsequent visits 80
Manicure, pedicure, facial treatment – First visit 100 subsequent visits 80
Manicure, pedicure, body scrub/full massage – First visit 150 subsequent visits 120
Manicure, pedicure, body scrub/full massage, facial treatment – First visit 200 subsequent visits 150
Manicure, pedicure, body treatment, facial treatment, massage – First visit 250 subsequent visits 200