Coffee, Tea, or Me?

Meet and greets. The concept of meeting a near stranger in a public place for a cup of coffee and a bit of chat isn’t new, or even special to the sex industry. Online friends do it when they come face-to-face for the first time. Photographers do it with prospective models (and vice versa). Hell, I’ve seen job interviews turn into a simple “I just wanted to check your personality type first, just to be sure everyone would click” thing.

Meet and greets are one of my favorite things to do in this business (quiet, you cheeky monkey, you KNOW what my favorite thing is). I love meeting new people, I love knocking out that first impression, and if you’ve ever met me, you know how chatty I can get! *the following is MY personal experience with MY M&Gs. YMMV*

First thing, I get an email asking to meet. A clever man has already given me a tidbit of information about himself, given his desire to see me (I rarely take those whose singular reason is “YOU’RE HAWWWT!”) and explained why he wants the meet and greet.

Reasons Why a Man Might Want a M&G

  • He’s brand new and has no references
  • He’s been away for quite some time, and his references have all retired
  • He’s been involved for a while, but chooses to not reveal his references
  • He simply wants a quick sit-and-chat without the pressure a full session can give

If I get a generally respectful and/or fun vibe from that initial email, we set a date and location. I have a few special spots I like to use for this: I know them, they are easy to get to, they are the perfect blend of busy and private, and usually they are in an area known for its wacky and unconventional pairings, conversations, styles, etc. I’ve never been looked askance at any of these places for my company or my conversation (if they notice us at all!) If the gentleman has already chosen a spot (close to work/home/the gym, or outside of a 30 mi radius of any of those things) I’ll normally honor it. I look it up on Google and Yelp.com and as long as it’s not a fancy place or a hole in the wall on Aurora I’m good to go.

We meet up! I try to wear something attractive yet casual for the location. Today, (for our purposes, I’m on an imaginary M&G) I am wearing a red A-line skirt, white blouse with black polka dots on it, a black leather belt with a bow on it, and black silk flats. My hair is in a simple twist, my makeup is tasteful (though my lips DO match my nails in vibrant red), and I brought along a book to look like I belong here. I always let the gentleman find me (and will tell him something about what I’ll be wearing/doing), and I always greet him as if he’s a new friend.

Now, I know many men stress about this part: wear what is comfortable for YOU and what is suitable for the location. Once, an over eager gent, with whom I conversed with a bit through email first, showed up in a beautifully tailored three-piece suit and wing tip shoes… to a Cafe Vita. He looked fabulous, and I told him so, but my love for tailored suits and wing tips shouldn’t supersede what is conventional for a location.

What do we talk about? Well, if he seems shy, I’ll pick up with easy questions:

  • How was your day?
  • What industry are you in?
  • What do you do for fun?
  • If you could, what is the one thing you’d do, no matter how crazy?

If they are bold, they wind up asking ME questions, which is always fun. Some “first date” questions I’m happy to ask:

  • How long have you been working?
  • Do you really dress vintage every day?
  • What are you most passionate about?
  • Do you like the “typical” Seattle weather?
  • What does your perfect “relaxing” day look like?

Easy things. Comfortable things. It’s not my intent to grill you about specifics about your life, I don’t want to see your ID, and I certainly won’t discuss anything sexual with you in public. As long as you keep to these same rules, your M&G will be a breeze! (And if you can tell the lady likes you, and you’ll know, ask to schedule right then!)

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